Nov 1st AM skype chat

Yesterday we had our first Sunday of the month skype chats.

I always feel the people who attend the skype sessions seem to get so much out of speaking to other people on the course. In our community of learners there are really interesting people with interesting and extensive experiences in dance: from the owners of dance schools to teachers in large institutions of dance to company directors and principle dancers in companies and all this from people who are all over the world at the moment. It is really wonderful to talk to each other.  I encourage you to join the next skype chat if you have not already.

We had two chats one in the afternoon which Helen is writing-up, please look at her blog http://www.helenkindred.blogspot.co.uk

We also had a morning chat which I will overview here.

We talked about analysis. This was raised from the perspective of analysis of your own experiences and history when writing the AoLs, in Module One and also analysis of the data collected in Module Three. (Analysis of your own interests, passed experiences and the inquiry process happens in Module Two also). We noted that analysis happens across the course. I felt the conversation moved towards realizing that to say analysis as if it were a thing is not enough. In many ways one needs to be clear what you mean by it. Other wise you run the risk of saying “I will do some analysis on this” without any idea what exactly you will be doing as if by saying the word you conjure up some event that will run itself. So what do you think analysis is, what attributes does it have?

In the conversation we moved from thinking of it as something that happens (ie one minute something is not analyzed and the next it is) to thinking of it as a process. I called it a process of seeing possibilities, and/or of seeing connections where you had not noticed them. Like a process of opening doors to see what is behind them.

Thinking about analysis led to thinking about a number of issues to do with voice.  I think this is because to analyze  something in the context of this course involves recognizing you are adding your voice/ideas to the thinking pot. Of course we believe you are anyway since you are experiencing through your body/eyes/life but recognizing this and contextualizing yourself within your work takes a kind of confidence. Confidence to be present in the work and confidence to know you don’t know everything but that is ok, you can still be there. We talked about this confidence. Sam talked about how strange it is however accomplished one is you can still feel a ‘little girl (or boy)’ : nervous and unconfident. She is going to blog more on this

http://samanthakettle.blogspot.co.uk

Confidence is interesting from an embodied perspective (like pain) it is one of those things that we can not feel in each other. So whenever we are judging other peoples’ confidence we are judging our ‘insides’ with their ‘outsides’, which is not like for like.  

Helen is going to post a little about the unknown and confidence in terms of improvisation and how improvisation teaches us to be ok with being in a state of response rather than needing to know what is next. She talked about the confidence of accepting the process rather than needing the conclusion.

All this brought up ideas about bridging gaps between knowing and feeling – this can be thought about both within the context of confidence and in the context of what we are doing when we analyze.

Sarah talked about the confidence and feeling, of seeing your own writing as an authentic voice. If you do not write much in your work or as a ‘dancer’ you might not see writing as a vehicle for your authentic voice and therefore it becomes something you add-on to things or avoid doing altogether (see not putting up blog posts !!!) but Sarah was saying like any voice it needs to be exercised and that she had newly seen the blogs as a way to practice communication through writing. Sarah is going to post on this: http://sarahsulemanji.blogspot.co.uk

Maria http://mariaranden.blogspot.no  is going to write further about connections and just getting thoughts down to be able to look at what you are thinking as it were. On her blog she has also written about the Professional Artefact in terms of looking for thoughts on this so please comment.

Julie talked about considering the process and not jumping to conclusions in a bid to feel something is ‘done’ or complete or must be understood. Look at the comments below for more from Julie.

Anna commented on not censoring yourself and bridging gaps in learning through exploring. http://annablogsblog.blogspot.co.uk

Suzy talked about fear of the unknown and also ownership of your own thoughts. She has written about connections as a response to the skype conversation  https://zsurcy.wordpress.com

What do you think…

Please comment

Adesola

“Now make it your own…” Morning group skype chat

This mornings skype chat went well. We had people from each Module chatting. We talked about the many ideas that start to manifest as you begin module two. And how it is exciting to be interested. Then considering that excitement that one comes across at points doing the module as a kind of energy. It is a good guide because that excitement gives you the energy to be brave enough to look at the unknown, to face maybe not finding an ‘answer’ or even a ‘question’. The excitement energy also gives you the vitality to re-consider. We talked about how learning might be ‘looking backwards’ not learning more but re-considering, re-positioning and changing/broadening perspectives about things you have already experienced or done. And that Module One is very much a process of doing this. We also talked about how the processes in Module One can feel as if a sense of inquiry, reflection, self-evaluation is awakened and these will nurture the activities of the later Modules, (your practice in general) and contribute to you being able to navigate the excitement energy of learning.

It was a really inspiring conversation hearing everyone’s ideas and gentle considerations. We are each going to write a little further on parts of the conversation.

Suzie www.zsurcy.wordpress.com  is going to post about the thinking process from Module One through to Module Three, and how she sees it as captured through a sense of questioning.

Amanda www.alawford.blogspot.com.au  is going to post about the sense of awakening (learning) that began in Module One and how it is developing now she is in Module Two.

Samantha www.samanthakettle.blogspot.com is going to post on ‘looking backward’ – changing perspectives as you question and find ways to articulate your experiences from the past in the new context of Module One.

Helen http://www.helenkindred.blogspot.com   is going to post on the holistic approach to the whole course and how it is like this because throughout it is connected for you by the fact you are in it. It is connected by ‘us’.

When we talked about the activity of Module One (from the perspective of doing it as Samantha is doing, and the perspective of it being a grounding for the next two Modules as Suzie and Amanda described) we talked about the opportunity one has in the dance studio when rehearsing or in class, to try out different approaches to a step, and get feedback. I am always suggesting to my students to come in with a particular thought for the day a colour, a focus: “point my feet”, a line of a poem and as well as listening the classes corrections on steps the student should try on how that approach manifests in their work. I am there to give feedback on this: to say “I don’t know what you are thinking about today but your arm work is so much more considered and connected to your back.” Just as we are used to this in the studio we can think of the blogs as the same tool. They are there to post ideas, views to try things out and get feedback. They are not their to make definitive finished statements about what is but they are there to have the opportunity to try different approaches, and receive feedback.

Lastly I also left the conversation with an image. I tried to find images to help describe the one in my head…

A question is not looking for answer like a two jigsaw pieces. You have a piece with a whole in it (a question) and you want to fill the hole. Such as below:

Consider that it is not a hole you want to fill with another piece of jigsaw (as above) = Question filled by answer.

It is a ‘hole’ that you want to change from being a ‘hole’ to being ‘something’, in other words the question is not an empty space to fil with an answer. The question is a way of noticing something. 

Noticing the ‘empty’ space is just finding a doorway to know more about the question. (Sometimes an answer is like slamming the door shut, and sometimes stepping through a door way can feel like stepping into a whole new infinite world and that is scary)

 becomes

becomes 

Feedback…comment…what do you think?

Adesola

Courage

We had two chats yesterday.

In the morning we talked about the AOLs 

We talked a lot about how the AOLs are capturing your experiences. The experiences that you feel are learning (responsibility) at MA level. Because of this one persons AOL might be a completely different topic from another persons. In fact it is not the topic that makes it at MA level it is the depth of analysis, understanding sensitivity that you have of the topic that makes it MA.

Across the years I have heard people say they don’t understand (don’t want to bother with) all the theory (particularly introduced in Module Two).  We talked about this in the evening chat. But we are not working with theory as something different from practice. The reason your AOL is at MA level because of what you make it not because of the topic itself is because this whole course has a non-positivist approach. In other words there is not a secret cave of MA level AOLs that you can discover and mine. There is no existing AOL that is at MA level. It is what you do with the AOL that makes it.

I feel as people finish Module One they have this but Module One is not a closed event. Thinking about what you did and why- how things worked out for you is thinking about the theory that you meet in Module Two.

Sometimes we doubt ourselves even when we are in the middle of something but I feel that to some extent one has to be brave enough to not waste too much time on this.  We talked about this in the evening session also. Rilke writes so well about this in ‘Letters to a Young Poet.’

‘…I want to beg you, as much as I can dear sir, to be patient towards all that is unsolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms and like books that are written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers , which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything.’ p. 35

They ‘cannot be given’ you is not that they cannot be given because someone has them and will not hand them over. They ‘cannot be given’ because you already have them – they are already in you.

‘…Think, dear sir, of the world you carry within you, and call this thinking what you will; whether it be remembering your own childhood or yearning toward your own future – only be attentive to that which rises up in you and set it above everything that you observe about you. What goes on in your innermost being is worthy of your whole love; you must somehow keep working at it and not lose too much time and too much courage in clarifying your attitude toward people.’ p.46

It is a kind of love that allows you to both not spend too much time considering yourself and doubting but also not too much time assuming you have a full grasp of everything.

As always we are not static in one defined thing we are in movement. We are not the AOL we are how we do the AOL - Going back to the ‘theory’ the perspective here is one is not looking for certainty because that impossible task has no grounding in lived experience , which is about change.

‘…consider yourself and your feeling right every time with regard to every such argumentation , discussion or introduction; if you are wrong after all, the natural growth of your inner life will lead you slowly and with time to other insights.’ p.29

The grace in this is when you consider your self ‘right’ do not consider yourself better. Just as you do not indulge in feeling less when someone does something that leads to a realisation and growth in you.  If we spend too much time on organising ourselves and others into being ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ we are stealing the movement of growth from the situation and statically switching from this (right) to that (wrong) instead of finding the artistry of change.

The dance is in the inbetweeness.

What do you think?

Adesola

Something I wrote for BAPP but thought might be useful to read here to…

Thinking about feedback….

I am getting lots of drafts and so busy working my way through things. I don’t read fast so it takes time because I don’t skim read; I need to read each word in order to really understand and analyze what is being said, because I want my comments to be meaningful and helpful.

But feedback is not sending a draft for my approval. The approval has to come from you – you making something (writing something) you feel ‘proud’ of or at lease feel you’ve tried your best at. Its about being honest with yourself on one hand and not leaving bits untouched because you don’t want to shake your own story by fixing them at this point. It is also about being diligent finding out the procedure for writing in this way, noticing the books you have read how things lay out and how they are presenting such as how people have used citations and then thinking about why it is done in that way and what it says about what you are trying to make.

Feedback you ask for from me is to get another eye looking at the work you are doing. If you send something and feel you cannot move forward before I get back to you

1)   Then feedback in that form does not seem the best form for the purpose you have. I would say you need to book a quick Skype call in order to discuss the specific points you feel you need input into before you can go on.

2)   Or your use of my feedback is not really ‘feedback’ it is ‘passing the buck’ asking me to edit your work for you!!! So you can use me to decide what should be in or out of your final piece _ I can’t do this for you!! You know what you want to create.

So please feel free to contact me in different forms according to what you need from your feedback. If it’s a quick block you need to talk out – email or skype (set up a time via email or call if you see me on-line). Then also have specific questions – ask what you want to know. Be direct about what you want me to look at that is because I am another eye so you can direct where I look.

I think it is really important in the performing arts to be clear and to have thought about the role of feedback. A few years ago I realised that when I choreographed something I would ask for feedback from a dance agency for instance. Then I realised I would get quite down when it wasn’t ‘can we book this piece’!!! what they would say was things to ‘improve’ the choreography or general comments. But that response is not feedback. I realised what I wanted was to bring my work to their attention NOT feedback and that by asking fro feedback I was putting my work in the light of something that was unfinished or something I was unsure about. That made me think that you have to  be really careful, direct and really want to hear the response when engaging with feedback. It is not there to reassure you, you are o.k.!!

What do you think?

Adesola